What Makes One Happy? Part 3

What Makes One Happy? Part 3

In my last two articles, I wrote about what makes me happy, both in the short-term and long-term. I spent very little time on my short-term happiness, and I plan to keep it that way in this article. It’s my long-term happiness that I will focus on in this article.

happiness is finding a parking meter with time on itWhen I think about what makes me happy in the short-term, I can’t help but think about listening to one of my favorite songs on my audio system. Be it on my smartphone, my home audio system, or in my awesome care with seven thunderous speakers that make my pants-leg move to the beat of the song. Wow. I also love hanging out with my friends, sharing food & drink over a meal. They are the most terrific friends in the world, and you know who you are. I’m looking forward to our next get together. Plus there are all the little things that happen each day, such as the feeling of completion of a job well done. All sorts of little things that make life fun and exciting.

Still, in the big picture, all of these little happiness’ do not measure up or compare to sharing these moments with an extraordinary woman. I’m fortunate enough to have found such a woman. There was a time, lasting for more than a decade where I feared I would not.

Now, I know that there are people out there, that do not need another person in their life. They hook up with someone and move on after a short while. That’s alright. It’s their life, and they are free to live it as they like.

However, for me, I can’t do that. In the short-term, sure. When I’m single and available, everything is game-on. From one night stands to hanging out for a couple of months is fine. But I’ve always known since I was a young adult, I needed someone to share my life with in profound and meaningful ways. I need a woman in my life. She has to be extraordinary, beautiful, and kind. I need a woman who will return my love, as I am, faults and all. Besides, I look upon the lady of my love with rosy glasses anyway, so she will be perfect in my eyes.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I have my faults and plenty of them. Yet, one thing I have learned in all my years is that in order to survive and thrive; I must be who I am. For too many years, I wore a mask hiding my true self and trying to be the person I thought she wanted me to be. What a mistake that was. I lost decades of happiness as a result.

Thankfully, I have rectified that error. I speak my mind, unforgiving in standing up for my beliefs. If you don’t like them, or can’t deal with them, well that’s on you. I am who I am and you can either accept it or not. Fortunately, my lady-love does accept me for who I am. I know that there are parts that she does not like but I must have more than enough to overcome those as she professes her love for me in return.

She makes me happy. Ecstatic in fact. Here’s how. In my everyday life, I have to leave the house and go to work, just as most of us have to. I’m functional and happy when I am away. I’m stable and even keel even when we’re apart.

The closer I get to her physically, the happier I get. When we’re in close proximity, my happiness scale jumps radically. And when we touch each other, physically touch and just about anywhere on each others body, my soul sings. Happiness MeterTake when we’re sleeping. I am overjoyed when we spoon up to each other; one arm draped over the other. My happiness meter jumps into the red-zone. As we sleep, I can sense when we roll over and are apart. That meter dips down and out of the red-zone. In my semi-conscious state, I’ll reach out and touch whatever part of her I can, just to connect and move that meter up. If for whatever reason, she rolls over to face me and in her sleep reaches out and holds me, I feel that meter explodes well above the red-zone.

The thing that surprises me is that her touch doesn’t have to be sexual at all. It’s the simple connection of skin to skin that excites me. Now, don’t get me wrong. I live for the sexual kinds of touch, but I tend to include those in the short-term happiness column. The long-term, red-zone touches are what make me happiest.

Touching is just one of the must haves on my short list in a long-term relationship. Yes, there are a few more, and in total are less than ten. She and I have shared that list with each other. There are lots more on the ‘it would be nice if she …’ list, but if some are missing, that’s alright. It’s the must-have list that is most important to me. I’ve already written about two of those on the list. I won’t list them all or otherwise; this article could become a novel, short as the list is. I am fortunate to have found a girl, no, a woman, who satisfies every one of those items.

We have our pet names for each other. Mine for her has changed over the years. The last couple of years, I’ve referred to her as ‘My Love.’ I use it everywhere. I call her that at the checkout counter of the grocery store or when I am answering a private question about which type of beans I prefer. I love saying that. “Yes, my love.” “No my love.” “Hey, love, want to go to a movie?” I hope she smiles every time she hears me say it. I certainly do.

I am thankful to her for everything she gives me. I suppose that at times, she doesn’t recognize it, but when things quiet down, I am positive that she does. I think about her every day, no, just about every minute of the day. I regularly review what she would think and do in this situation or that. What would she think about a decision I am contemplating? Or just simply, picture her in my mind and smile.

One time, I feared I would never find the love of my life. Well, that’s not quite true. I was confident I would. I would search forever if need be to find her. I found her in the most extraordinary way and on our first date, we talked for hours over dinner which included some of the most bizarre topics. Topics that included how we would like to be buried when we died. How odd is that on a first date?

So, I have found her, the love of my life. The one that makes me happy in the long-term. She’s the one. Love, don’t you ever die on me. You hear me, love? I’ve got too much loving to do and much more happiness to explore.

Evil Meter

Summer in the City

Summer in the City

Do you remember the song ‘Summer in the City‘ by the Lovin’ Spoonful? Every time I hear it, memories of a time long ago flood my mind. But, let me step back a moment.

Summer in the CityI was just poking around my computer, checking out sales on my books, checking my social feeds and I was just about to move on to working my second draft of ‘Lucky Bitch‘ when this song came on the radio.

Ah, the radio. Well actually, it’s my satellite music feed that I get through my computer but so what. The concept is the same. Anyway, if you recall the song, it has a distinctive opening note. Actually a chord played on the organ.

summer-in-the-cityInstantly, I was transported back to a time when I was a youngling. The song was released in July 1966 and I was ten years old. By this time, I had my own transistor radio. Remember those? The size of a pack of cigarettes and it ran on one 9-volt battery. That radio lived in my shirt pocket for many years, playing my favorite tunes on AM radio. I could be simply be walking around the outside of my house or playing with my friends and family as my parents watched from a distance. I felt warm and safe. And I had my tunes.

hot girls in the summer2Summer in the City‘ is one of those songs I can never get enough of. Today, with the advent of auto repeat, I turn on that feature and lose maybe a half hour of time to my revelry. While I listen to the song, I lose myself in a world of imagination, peace and love, and endless summers without a care in the world.

hot girls in the summer1Later in life, I came to associate the song with the coming of summer when girls appeared, walking around in short shorts, skimpy tank tops and sandals. I couldn’t wait for my first sighting of boobs barely contained behind tank tops and legs that seemed to stretch forever. Hearing the song, my heart would race, imaging sweat beading up on the faces of these lovelies. Eventually, I found my own lovely lady and would kiss those sweet droplets away.

hot_girls_you_meet_on_the_streets_640_48To this day, this song elicits joy in my heart and smiles on my face. No matter what time of year I hear it, I find peace and love in my soul.

What about you? Do you share the same feelings? Different ones perhaps? For different songs? hot girls in the summer 4I must tell you, that for me, songs bring out emotions and feelings that I either hate, love or somewhere in between. I can only assume, having no other frame of reference, that everyone shares the same.

This is Richard Verry, writing to you while listening to ‘Summer in the City’, once again set on endless repeat. Peace and love everyone.

The Love of my Life

“Everyone makes mistakes in life, but that doesn’t mean they have to pay for them the rest of their life. Sometimes, good people make bad choices. It doesn’t mean they are bad. It means they are human.”
— author unknown

I read this quote on social media just now. It touched me. Does it touch you? Do you believe that mistakes are rectifiable? Is everyone who made a mistake a bad person? If you believe this, what does that say about you?

I will admit. I’ve made mistakes, many mistakes in my life. I do try harder, each and every day, to make better choices. However, it is important to me that I remain ‘me’. I spent too many years trying to be what others wanted me to be. All I got in return was pain and heartache. I grieved, I cried, I nearly died.

Today, I am a happier person. I love what I do and who I am. I make no bones about who I am. You are welcome to take me as I am or not. Do I care? Possibly. Yet, in the end, I cannot change who I am. I love who I am and what I love. Thankfully, the love of my life, maggical (my term of endearment for her), accepts me for who I am and what I love.

I love you maggical and I will forever.

Newest Release coming soon

The Breakup Upright BookThe Breakup

Check out the book cover for my latest novella, a dark erotic love story of misconceptions and misunderstandings.

Back from editing, publication formatting is in the works. Look for it soon on my website or at your favorite eBook site.

Holidays in Mona’s Realm

HOLIDAYS AS THEY RELATE TO MY CHARACTERS

Are there holidays in Mona’s Realm?

Hot Chocolate Warmest HolidaysHolidays are completely different in Mona Bendarova’s world. Introduced in ‘The Taste of Honey’, Mona’s community comes together for monthly and quarterly celebrations. There are no holidays per se commemorating people, specific events or beliefs.

Monthly celebrations are more of a community gathering where people come together and enjoy each other’s company. It’s a time for revelry, entertainment, eating, drinking, and enjoying sex. Seed is spilled and deposited into willing recipients frequently at these celebrations. Most fertile women wake up the following morning happy and pregnant after a night of pleasure. For the rest, they are simply happy and most certainly satiated.

Quarterly celebrations on the other hand are bigger and more involved events. Generally, they follow the seasons, roughly scheduled around the Summer and Winter Solstices plus the Fall and Spring Equinoxes.

The Spring Equinox hails the coming growing season where the community plans to produce the bulk of their non-protein based food. The Summer Solstice salutes the height of the warm sun, long pleasant days and short warm nights. The Fall Equinox celebrates the harvest gathering, giving thanks for what the land has given them despite the atrocities it suffered in the past.

Winter Blonde in White Knit DressThe biggest celebration of the year is the Winter Solstice. This festivity focuses upon hope and joyful reunions for the coming year. It is denoted by enjoying the rich milky way of stars lighting the night skies, providing a backdrop for a magical time of year. The longest night of the year is celebrated by staying warm, enjoying each other’s bodies and conceiving the greatest diversity within the gene pool. Even conceptions in the breeding farms don’t distribute the gene pool as much as what happens at this celebration.

Therefore, celebrations are a holiday in a sense. They provide an opportunity to ensure the survival of the human species. It is a way to enjoy life yet most importantly, to preserve it.

Now, as I reflect upon these celebrations, I can’t help wish that our own holidays follow a similar scenario. Fun and revelry among friends and strangers where sharing joy, pleasure and seed is expected, world-wide? What’s not to like? Not that I expect to see it come to pass in my lifetime but I wonder what our lives might be like sharing similar celebrations. I firmly believe that we would be better off if we divorce ourselves from out petty differences, slice away the personal agendas and welcome our differences as opportunities to grow.

IDIC MedallionAs I write this, I am reminded of the concept ‘IDIC’ introduced by Gene Roddenberry in his original TV series, ‘Star Trek’. ‘IDIC’ stands for Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations. I embrace this view of the world. I firmly believe we are better with our differences than without. Rather than homogenizing our species, it’s our differences that allow us to grow stronger.

What do you think? Can we all embrace our differences, enjoy our humanities and love our fellow-man? I do.

Please, share your thoughts with me. I welcome constructive view points, whether I agree with them or not. Perhaps one day, world-wide, we can celebrate a holiday of love, joy and pleasure.

What was YOUR favorite part of ‘The Taste of Honey’?

The Taste of HoneyWhat was YOUR favorite part of the book?

There are many favorite parts. They include among many, Mona’s dungeon play with Master Charles, the execution scene of Honey’s perpetrator, Mona’s investigation into Honey’s disappearance, Mona’s budding relationship with Renée and Honey’s final scene as she is preparing for her live roasting.

As I look back at each scene and how I felt when I wrote them, I realized that it was Honey’s roasting scene that was my favorite part. While the sex and her spitting is graphic, it was the love story that developed out of it that really captured my interest.

I wrote it from the first person perspective so that the reader would connect with Honey and accept her decision for a live roasting.

What I really liked about the scene is that you’re inside her head, experiencing what she experiences. You feel her final hours as she has her final sex with her Master, loving him as he discovers that he, in fact, loves her also. You, as the reader, experience the spit pushing into her sex, traveling through her body and exiting out her mouth. Ewe! You are right there with Honey as they gut her insides. You see what she sees as she is carried over to the fire pit and begins to roast. Through her eyes, you see her family and friends looking on, before she succumbs to the heat of the fire.

010-ReflectionsBWWhat I really liked about this scene is how I felt as I wrote it. When I started the writing the scene, my mind seemed to divorce itself from my body. My fingers flew over the keyboard. As the scene developed, I got wrapped up in her character. I felt for her. For awhile, I became her.

Ultimately, the scene defines the love relationship between Honey, her Master, her family and her closest friends, including Mona. Her spirituality is so strong that no one can divert her from this course. Even her own Master has told her over and over again that she did not need to do this. In this moment, he realizes that he loves and needs her. He needs her in his life and doesn’t want her to roast.

Honey, however, believes that she has a higher calling. Honey believes that her actions will help save them. She believes that her decision will allow her to live forever in him and her loved ones. As a result, they will live healthier and happier lives.

So, for those and for many other reasons, that is my favorite part of the book. What’s yours?

How did you come up with the title ‘The Taste of Honey’?

The Taste of HoneyHow did you come up with the title? Did the title come first or did the story?

For months, I had a concept of what I wanted to write. I had developed the idea of a future history of the human race dependent upon consuming themselves to survive. Originally, I had thought at it would be the result of a devastating war that put the species on the brink of extinction. It wasn’t until later, that I came up with the GMO angle running wild, systematically wiping out all protein based biologically life on the planet.

Yet that didn’t help me decide on a specific story line. I wanted a story in which I would highlight a main character who would by the end, decide to be live roasted and her meat consumed by her family and close friends. I wanted the live roasting to be the character’s choice and not forced upon the character. Further, I wanted the other main characters to feel comfortable with consuming the meat of one who had been one of their own. I struggled over months to find a way to carry out that goal.

In that time, I wrote draft after draft but none of them spoke to me. Then one day, while sitting on my deck, enjoying roasting under the summer afternoon sun, the phrase ‘The Taste of Honey’ hit me. It was a eureka moment. As I reflected upon the phrase, I decided immediately that it would be the title of the story.

Blonde with open back tshirt facing wallNow, at that time, I wasn’t even thinking about publishing the story. I just wanted to write it. Now that I had a title, the rest of the story came together in a flash. Within minutes, I was furiously writing notes, capturing thoughts and ideas before they flashed out of existence. For me, it was a race to document the ideas, never mind whether I would use them all.


A couple of hours later, I had a clear concept of what I wanted to write and I began writing anew. Honey was not only to be the subject of the title but she would be a main character in the story.

It was a journey of self discovery, of retrospection and of desire. Desire in the sense of curiosity of seeing the story come to its conclusion. I knew what I wanted to write but I wanted to see it written on paper. The story took on a life of its own and before I knew it, it was no longer a short story but a full length novel.

Mona and Honey give thanks

BeautyYesterday, BFF’s Mona and Honey spent the day together, sharing memories and creating new ones. Since Honey is carrying, Mona took it upon herself to go visit her friend. A lot has happened since they first met six months ago.

They talk about everything, from the smallest little details of their daily life to the big ones involving their respective Masters. The one thing they do not talk about is how they came to meet. Honey was stalked, attacked, kidnapped and almost killed. Everyone else thought that she had simply run away from home, shirking her duties to her family and community.

010-ReflectionsBWMona found her, rescued her and saved her from almost certain death. She discovered who the perpetrator, who was later punished. As a result of the events, the traumatized Honey and Mona became best friends. Neither would have it any other way.

In sharing time together yesterday, they relished the opportunity to be thankful for finding each other and their respective lives, their housemates and their Masters. Sharing a superb meal together, they talked, laughed and even cried long into the evening.

Not to be left out, they also included many of Honey’s housemates into their circle of fellowship. Till now, most of them would usually leave them alone, knowing that they needed their time together alone. Besides, most of them were in awe with a bit of hero-worship towards Mona. Their honor restored through Mona’s relentless search to discover the truth of Honey’s disappearance, they believed they owed a debt to Mona. Mona didn’t think so. She was just doing what she does what she does.

So, yesterday, the two women invited them into their circle, answered questions, posed some their own and enjoyed each others company well into the night.

As Mona drove home afterwards, she reflected upon the warm feelings, emotions and fellowship offered her that day. She couldn’t help but feel grateful by their attentions. After all, in her mind, what she did for that family was a very small thing indeed. She would have done it for anyone.

But one thing could be said for the day. She was very thankful that Honey was forever, a part of her life.