Followup to ‘How do I think of these things’

Followup to ‘How do I think of these things’

In my last article, I wrote about how I come up with my ideas for my books. I received several comments from people who read my books. I found them interesting.

The first comment comes from a reader who read my first book, ‘The Taste of Honey.’ At the time, this reader wrote me and, if I recall correctly, told me she had a hard time with the story. She considered herself to be a traditional, conservative person and didn’t read all that much. However, a friend turned her onto the book and while struggling with the storyline, discovered an underlying unexpected love story that she loved. It turned her around, and she eventually wrote a compelling five-star review.

The following is what I received in response to the article.

“I found it insightful as well as a confirmation of what I already felt in my heart was the way you find your inspirations. I’ve always believed you to be intelligent and extremely creative. It’s nice to see you finding the right outlet for that creativity (of which you do so well!).” jb

Apparently, she knows me well, and yes, I am acquainted with this person.

Another reader sent me this comment.

“It’s hard to understand how you can write that in such detail and emotion. And, not wonder about you. […] After reading your statements and seeing that your girlfriend felt the same way, I think I feel much better. Maybe, lol.” gd

Her Client Trilogy StackedI am only just becoming acquainted with this reader, having recently received several comments and messages regarding my ‘Her Client’ trilogy. After reading the first book, she contacted with a note indicating how much she liked it. After reading the second book, I received a second comment expressing the need “… to think about this one?” implying that the story might have been a bit over the top for her. [No surprise. This book is intentionally horrific and deals with the real monsters among us.] Her followup to this comment to this book inspired me to write my previous article. The last I heard, the reader was just starting the third book, ‘Her Essentia.’ I have little doubt that she will send me an additional note.

Interestingly enough, the ‘Her Client’ books are my best sellers. I never expected that to happen. As a result, those are the kinds of books I will continue to focus on as I write.

The Trafficking ConsortiumI received many comments on the article. I hope it helps you understand where I am coming from and where I am going. My stories don’t come from personal experiences. Rather, they come from observation and wondering, “what if …”.

That’s how my latest book, ‘The Trafficking Consortium’ came to life. I was at my doctor’s office and as I sat in the waiting room, wondered “what if someone behind the counter and sent the medical history of a patient to someone who had no right to the file?” From there, the pieces just fell into place, and Avril’s story came to life.

The BreakupThen there’s ‘The Breakup’, a story about what a woman hopes will happen on a date of dinner and dancing. My ‘what if’ revolved around the word, dancing. “What was his definition of dancing?” Ginny is about to find out. The question is, will she be happy about it?

Overall, I don’t really know what to say. If you, my current and new followers, continue to read my books, what am I going to do but keep writing new ones that tickle your fancy and your emotions? I have notes on several ideas for future stories. Stay tuned.


maggicalExpressionsOh, and I almost forgot. I finally finished putting together my online art gallery. It’s called ‘maggicalExpressions.’ Links to it are on my book site.

Yes, that’s correct. I paint and draw when I need to disappear. Oh, yes, that’s what I do when I write. Well, it’s a different kind of medium, and I enjoy it. I hope you like them.


It’s a nice day today, blue sky, and lots of sun. I’m going to work on my book most of the day, and then I’m going to a party tonight. I can’t wait. It’s a themed party sponsored by a social club I belong to. It’s been way too long since I’ve attended one. I’m looking forward to it.


Have a great day and a better tomorrow.
Rich

Life’s learned lessons

Life’s learned lessons

Good Day Everyone. Looking at my site, I just realized that I haven’t posted in a week. I knew it had been a while, but I didn’t know that it was that long. Sorry about that.

To tell you the truth, I’ve been seeing a lot of doctors and going to Physical Therapy (PT) lately. I’m working on my post-concussion issues, and I have made some progress and learned a few things. The two biggest things that I learned are:

  1. I’m still not ready to go back to work. (Shit!)
  2. I’m dwelling too much on my headaches and other issues, and not enough on life.

Number 1 scared me until I learned about number 2. I must accept it and deal with it while living my life. I’m sure that my colleagues at work won’t be happy with number 1, but I’m not in control of that aspect of my life. ‘It is what it is.’ As I write this, David Bowie’s ‘Space Oddity’ is playing in the background and I just realized that I identify with many of the verses in the song.

To deal with number 2, I’ve been advised to change things up in my life. Change the venue so to speak. What does that mean? Well, for one thing, get out of the house more often. Now that the holidays are over, I can do that on my terms rather than on someone else’s terms.

My psychologist asked me an important question. “What are your go to items that make you happy?”

An easy answer for once, “Drawing and Painting, Writing, and Sharing intimate time with my girlfriend.” (I don’t necessarily mean sex, but that’s an important part.)

The problem is that all are suffering. I don’t yet have my painting studio setup which prevents me from putting paint to canvas. My injury stopped me from working on it for several months. I muddle through it at times, but I usually ran out of steam before getting far. I’m now motivated to get it done.

The Trafficking ConsortiumThen there is the writing. Without my creative stream running through my head, I am struggling to come up with a storyline. What I do know is that last October, I put pencil to paper and came up with several new compositions that I am very happy with. Drawing them put me in a headspace that made me happy and I forgot about my chronic headache. Checking my headache logs, I discovered that during those days and the following weeks, my headaches were relatively mild. And guess what? That’s when I had my inspiration for ‘The Trafficking Consortium.’ Writing it consumed me, and after looking at the logs, the headaches never surpassed a four on a scale of zero to ten. What do you know?

I can draw almost anywhere and yet; I prefer either my studio or my office. They represent my personal space and allow me to dive in without distractions. Until last night, my office was not configured to allow me to draw easily. It is now. 😉 Starting later today or tomorrow, I’ll finish a piece I started months ago and move on. Perhaps that will be the avenue to find inspiration for a new story. In fact, I’m betting on it.

That leaves the last of my goto’s, my girlfriend. Due to my injury and other issues, which I am not going to go into, our relationship has been strained. She is concerned about my condition and often frustrated that she can’t help. So, I was advised to change things up, do things differently and do it in new environments.

So, change the venue, right? Last night, the two of us went for a walk around my neighborhood. The first time since last fall. I usually do it alone. It was nice. Later today, we’re planning on doing a couple of errands together and then go to the movies. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen a movie in a theater. I’m looking forward to it. We’ve also made plans to go out more, see friends in other venues, rather than have them come to our house. I’m also looking forward to playing cribbage or other games together which we’ve not done since last summer. Playing games at the table gets us away from the TV, and conversing in an intimate setting which is something I crave.

What does all this mean to you, my fans and followers of my blog and readers of my books? Despite what my marketer muse has told me, I’m going to stop forcing myself to write a daily blog. It is stressful to think of topics to write that you are interested in and it takes time away from life, my girlfriend, and my happy place. But don’t fret, I will write you at least weekly and maybe more as things settle down. Yes, it will be true that I will miss your interactions and responding to your comments. You can comment all you like. I will read, and I will write back.

In the meantime, just know that I love and appreciate all of you. Thank you for your support and reading my books. Be sure to look for my latest novel ‘The Trafficking Consortium,’ which I will be publishing on Amazon in early Feb.

Have a great day and a better tomorrow!

Comradery

Comradery

Six people gathered last night around a table. Six people shared food and drink, each telling their stories, commiserating over pain and anguish, laughing and smiling over accomplishments, as they all looked forward to the coming weeks and months in their lives.

Hands stacked in comradery Others could ask why these six people had appeared together. Watching the group, I can see why. Twenty years in age separate the youngest to the eldest. They come from all walks of life. They consist of nerds and extraverts, techies and non-techies. There’s a renaissance man, a secular politician, a project manager, a software engineer, a contractor, and finally but not least, a therapist. They are smart, street smart, worldly and sheltered. Frankly, something I don’t understand, is how, why and under what circumstances these unlikely of people could gather together and share their precious time together?

As the evening progressed, conversations and stories ranged the gamut. Topics covered, included politics, religion, sports, movies and television, health and wellness, drama, social clubs, travel, vacations, the menu, Cannabis (weed) and medicine, and,Cannoli's well the list goes on and on. Take, for example, television and movies. In short order, the group touched on ‘Galaxy Quest’ as a spoof of ‘Star Trek,’ ‘Dr. Who,’ ‘Guardians of the Galaxy,’ ‘The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy,’ ‘Humans,’ ‘Brain Dead,’ ‘Designated Survivor,’ ‘MacGyver,’ and a plethora of others. Travel and vacations turned to ‘Disney World,’ and Hawaii. Food included the best recommendations from the menu, including ‘Cannolis,’ and Steak Bombers, thin-crust pizza vs. thick-crust, and the excellent fish fry. For three-plus hours, this unlikely group shared themselves with each other.

Making the impossible, possible.
Making the impossible, possible.

What amazes me is most is how apparent each of the six cares for and respects each other. They are patient and kind, compassion and caring. It is evident to me; that should any one of them need support, guidance or redirection, everyone would pitch in and help, offer their assistance and assist the one in need to overcome the challenge. The comradery between them is, for me, the most precious wealth in their combined treasure box. They are not comrades in arms. Instead, they are comrades in friendship. Together, they make the impossible — possible.

I don’t know why, especially due to the diversity of ages and backgrounds, but I am proud to call them … my friends.

Love you all. I had a great time. Thanks.

p.s. As always, please feel free to leave me a comment. I enjoy reading them.

Followup to Goals without a Plan

Yesterday, I wrote about goals without a plan is nothing more than a wish. In fact, I believe it’s more than that. It’s wishful thinking.

However, once you have the plan, you are already on the road to meeting your goals. For me, that’s the fun part. Taking the first step, then the next and then, the next one again. I’ve always believed that to reach the summit, you must put one foot in front of the other. Step over over the pebbles and eventually you’ll step over the stone, and eventually the mountain.

Earlier, I stumbled upon this followup quote.

“There’s no elevator to success. You have to take the stairs.”

Makes sense to me, despite that I wish that it were possible to jump ahead of the line and go right to the top.

No Elevator to SuccessThe image I’ve displayed shows the quote surrounded by a spiraling stair case. I can’t imagine how many steps it would take to climb that stair case and reach the top. Hundreds? Thousands?

However many there are, in real life, it takes much more to achieve our goals. My goals. I’ve spent decades learning, experiencing, and experimentation before deciding upon my goals. Some of my goals have fallen to the wayside in favor of newer, more interesting goals.

Do you know what I find if fun? Working on my goals, figuring them out and taking the steps to achieve them. For me, it’s sitting down in front of my computer and transcribing the dialog running through my head. It’s picking up a pencil or paint brush and putting it to paper or canvas. Adrenaline begins racing throughout my body. I’m excited and the imagery in my mind feeds off the adrenaline and suddenly, my fingers can’t move fast enough. Whether it’s typing on a keyboard or stroke after stroke of my pencil or brush, I pour my heart and soul into each creative work.

Years later, I can look at a painting I did, notice one of my books on the shelves and the excitement returns in an immeasurable instant. Every so often, I review Honey’s story in my book, The Taste of Honey, and I’m filled with joy, wonderment and concern. I want her to be saved. I want her to thrive. I know that she has a goal in mind and that goal will survive death. She’ll make it happen. She has a plan. You’ll see as you delve into her world along with her best friend, Mona Bendarova.

Damn, I love what I do. I hope you do and if you don’t, well that’s okay too. You’re welcome to your opinion. Who am I to tell you what to think. So, to conclude, I hope I can instill this one thought and it’s a motto I’ve lived with my entire life. As far as I can tell, no one else has said this and I’ve repeated the mantra in my head every day of my adult life, and I’ve been around a while. I would be interested in your comments and responses. Please send me a note. I’ll be happy to read them.

My personal motto is this.

“Nothing is impossible. Everything is possible. It’s all in the attitude.” – Richard Verry

Goal without a Plan

I was poking around this morning, wondering what I might write about and I stumbled across this quote.

Quote-GoalWithoutPlan“A goal without a plan is simply a wish.” CalamusWorks

I can’t think of a day in my life where I hadn’t chosen a goal without establishing a plan. It seems natural to me. I make plans almost without conscious thought.

Take for example my recent move from my old home to my new one. Once the decision was made, I started developing the plan to make it happen and as efficiently as possible. It took months to make it happen but it did. Whenever I leave the house to do a number of errands, I don’t just get in my car and go. Instead, as I’m buckling in, I plan my route to be as efficient as possible. That means, go from one destination to another without crossing my path. Some people say I’m being ridiculous. Though I can see their point, I don’t agree. Gasoline is expensive and I don’t want to waste it by retracing my route.

When it comes to writing and painting, I also have a plan but those seem to be much more fluid in nature. It drives me crazy but I have to keep adjusting the plan as each day goes by. I know what my end goal is and I have plan to get there. However, I keep coming across so many unknowns and interruptions that I find it hard to stay on the path (plan).

Sometimes, it is simple fatigue. Sometimes someone needs my assistance and I’m glad to help. Sometimes obligations get in the way. Not that I don’t want to live up to my obligations. I do, though sometimes I wish they didn’t exist. I accepted them so I will make sure I deliver.

These and many more tend to pull me away from following the plan to writing success.

Which raises the question. With any goal and the plan that makes it happen, what is the measure of success in reaching that goal? Buying and house and moving, seems easy enough. Sign the closing papers and move in. Run an errand?

What is my measure of success in reaching my goal of becoming a well-known and successful author and painter? I have to give that some more thought. That too seems to be fluid. I want to be successful, I need to define what it means to be a successful author and painter.

Stay tuned. I’ll let you know what I come up with.

Whirlwind nearly over, part 8

Don't Worry, Be HappyThings seem to be settling down since the shock of the change in employment status by my girlfriend and committed partner. The last 48 hours have been less stressful, we’re sleeping normally again, and I am not as worried about her as I was. Don’t get me wrong. I’m still worried about her but I’ve got it under control. Fortunately, she recognizes my paranoia. It’s there, no doubt. It’s an issue I will deal with. I worry but it’s my job to worry about her.

Does that mean I’ve gotten over my worrying for her emotional state? No, but I’ve learned that I can keep that to myself. She has enough on her plate. Speaking of, she dropped the line on me that shook me. She told me “I might just take the entire summer off.” I had not expected that but upon reflection it makes sense. What she was insistent on was that I had better “not tell her what to do”. Even better, never … ever say “we lost thousands of dollars this summer by you not working”.

No problem. If she even wants to take the fall off, by all means, go for it. If she wants to completely retire, then I’m okay with that as well. It’ll be a few years earlier than we had originally planned but so what. If it makes her happy, then I’m happy.

What does concern me were all of the future plans we had set up, which assumed her continuing to work full-time for the next couple of years. We had planned on buying a second home to winter at. Is that plan now in jeopardy? I really don’t know but I really want to spend my winters in the warm sun, drinking beers on the beach and write my books.

So, it is apparent to me that I will need to reevaluate the plan and adjust accordingly.

Don’t worry honey. I have your back.

Whirlwind nearly over, part 7

Well, I knew it was too good to be true. Nearly over? Not quite.

7653712_sSure enough, Murphy’s Law kicked in. Mid-afternoon yesterday, our household was kicked in the gut. The love of my life, my girlfriend and partner in the house we purchased together, lost her job.

Granted, we knew it was a possibility. Under new management, the home health care agency she worked for was going through a transition. Not only is her entire department being retired, so are many of the community programs they maintained. By years end, hundreds of citizens who depend upon their services will have to find a new agency to get the needs they need and their respective doctors prescribe.Climbing the Broken Ladder

I was well aware of the transitioning but I never fathomed the scope it would take on. My GF knew that she needed to justify her job and she worked hard at making her immediate supervisor look good. Her efforts were for naught.

The first indication came yesterday when she received a text from her supervisor that she had been canned. Minutes later, the managers under the supervisor received an email to attend a mandatory meeting within the hour. Within minutes, it was announced that due to budgetary reasons, she was being let go and she was immediately walked out of the office, unable to collect her personal effects. Not that she did anything wrong, that’s just their policy.

Now, I know what it’s like to be involuntarily terminated. It’s happened twice in my career. She has never had the pleasure. I feel for her. She’s maintaining a great front, already networking etc. I know different.

She laid awake much of the night, staring at the ceiling. Normally, when up in the middle of the night, she’ll pull out her tablet and browse the web and social sites. Not last night. I could feel the turmoil boiling in her brain.

The crappy thing is that I know from personal experience, there is nothing I can do to help except be there when she needs me. When she does, I’ll hold her, hug her, let her cry on my shoulder, whatever she needs. I will help her as she has done for me. There is no advice in the world that will help her deal with her feelings. Together, we will get through this.

One thing I know, she’ll process the feelings, transition from stage to stage and come out on the other side a stronger woman. She’ll put it behind her and look forward to the next chapter in her life. Opportunities for her abound and she’ll make the best of them. Word is spreading fast and she has already received a suggestion to come work for another agency. She is holding off and taking the time to figure out just what she wants to do.

She’ll grow from the experience and be a better person for it.

Sorry hun and have a margarita. I love you.

Essay on self marketing.

Instead of writing, I have been studying. My research includes a plethora of books, websites I’ve found, webinars, and social media threads. What am I studying?

By now, you know that I am an author, independently publishing my books on Amazon and all of various eBook outlets and distributors. I also have some of my books available as paperbacks. I created a website to promote my creative works. Yes, I am also an artist. I paint and draw for fun. I don’t actively sell my art.

I focus my attentions on my writings. I write creative fiction. My stories revolve around mystery and suspense stories of an erotic nature. Some tell me that one series of my books are akin to science fiction. Frankly, I was surprised by that comment. I never thought of them that way. They are set thousands of years in our future but does that make them sci-fi?My other series of books tend to focus on criminal acts of assault, torment, and murder. These books are not science fiction.

What I am not, is a marketer. In all of my education, I have never studied marketing. I don’t know how to market myself, my products nor even my career. I have a master’s degree in Information Technology. I never took even a single course on how to market myself. How is that even possible?

Today, I am studying marketing. More specifically, I am studying how to market myself and my books. Frankly, it’s a daunting task. I’ve encountered setbacks, mistakes, and minor successes. I’ve spent thousands of dollars hiring marketing people, test adverts, rebuilding my websites, and learning.

I’ll be the first to admit. I don’t know what I’m doing. I make mistakes, lots of mistakes. I am slowly learning. It’s frustrating. I listen to experts. I work hard to implement the lessons I’ve learned. I am intelligent. I know my mission. I found good people. I found people who don’t get me or my vision.

Taste of Honey book cover 3D
The Taste of Honey

I found people who tried to tell me to sell to a target audience that I instinctively knew was wrong. In one such lesson, I was advised to target the LGBT community because they were simply a smaller target group but big enough to make progress in new sales. Was this wrong?

No, I don’t think so. The problem? Since my stories include women kissing and having sex together, made the stories perfect in targeting the LGBT community.

The trouble was, these characters are heterosexual. In the universe I created, they simply don’t have any stigmas against same-sex intercourse. They don’t share today’s morality related to sex and relationships. This person didn’t get it. Fine. Move on. Lesson learned.

Today, I am studying. I am researching. I am learning. In short, I’m trying. I am determined. I’m opening a new chapter in my training. Come what may, it will work or not. I’ll keep on trying, working, and figuring it out. Wish me luck.

The Love of my Life

“Everyone makes mistakes in life, but that doesn’t mean they have to pay for them the rest of their life. Sometimes, good people make bad choices. It doesn’t mean they are bad. It means they are human.”
— author unknown

I read this quote on social media just now. It touched me. Does it touch you? Do you believe that mistakes are rectifiable? Is everyone who made a mistake a bad person? If you believe this, what does that say about you?

I will admit. I’ve made mistakes, many mistakes in my life. I do try harder, each and every day, to make better choices. However, it is important to me that I remain ‘me’. I spent too many years trying to be what others wanted me to be. All I got in return was pain and heartache. I grieved, I cried, I nearly died.

Today, I am a happier person. I love what I do and who I am. I make no bones about who I am. You are welcome to take me as I am or not. Do I care? Possibly. Yet, in the end, I cannot change who I am. I love who I am and what I love. Thankfully, the love of my life, maggical (my term of endearment for her), accepts me for who I am and what I love.

I love you maggical and I will forever.

Sleep Loss Dumbs You Down

Lately, I’ve not been sleeping through the night. Try as I might, I wake up for good between 4 and 4:30 a.m. Over the past year, I’ve been doing okay, but this last week, not so good, and I’m at a loss. I have no significant stress in my life. Life is good. I have no worries to deal with or other such crap. In fact, up until this past weekend, I’ve been writing, reading, doing well at work and performing my annual winter cleaning of the house. As I wrote above, life is good.

So, why this week, can I only get four to five hours sleep? Beats me.

How is this effecting me?

I wake up, lie in bed trying to fall back. No good. I get up, shower and dress, go to work. I’m doing my job, albeit, I’m not firing on all cylinders. That is, I’m not up to my usual efficiency.

I get home and I can’t get my mindset in a creative mode. I can’t write, I can’t draw, I can’t even plan dinner. And oh, I have the munchies. This is new for me. I don’t understand it. I know that my stomach if fine, but my brain keeps telling my mouth to eat. What’s that all about anyway?

I did some more research on sleep deprivation. After reading about all of the usual stuff, I stumbled on this page from WebMD. #2 on the list refers to ‘Sleep Loss Dumbs You Down’.

http://www.webmd.com/sleep-disorders/excessive-sleepiness-10/10-results-sleep-loss

"Sleep plays a critical role in thinking and learning. Lack of sleep hurts these cognitive processes in many ways. First, it impairs attention <check>, alertness <√>, concentration <√>, reasoning <√>, and problem solving <√>. This makes it more difficult to learn efficiently. During the night, various sleep cycles play a role in 'consolidating' memories in the mind. If you don't get enough sleep, you won't be able to remember what you learned and experienced during the day <√>."

Everyone of these points is how I feel right now. The trick is, what to do about it.

Number 4 on the list is the worst. “Lack of Sleep Kills Sex Drive”. I don’t need to read that blurb to know exactly what they are about to report. I’m feeling it and for a writer and painter that dabbles in erotica, this is awful. How can I capture on paper or canvas a sex scene if I can ‘t feel it myself.

The rest of the article goes on with the other effects of lack of sleep. So, that to do about it?

  • Block out adequate nighttime sleep period? <√>
  • Keep distractions out of bed? (Reserve your bed for sleep and sex.) <√> (Hard but doable.)
  • Set a consistent wake-up time? <√>
  • Gradually move to an earlier bedtime? <√>
  • Set consistent, healthy mealtimes? <√>
  • Exercise? (ok, I need to work more on this despite the fact that I was sleeping better before this week.)
  • De-clutter your schedule? <√>
  • Don’t go to bed until you’re sleepy? <√> (Trouble is, I’m sleepy even now, first thing in the morning.)
  • Don’t nap late in the day? <√>
  • Create a relaxing bedtime ritual? <√>
  • Avoid “nightcaps”? <√> (Well, in desperation, I tried a glass of red wine to see if it would help. Not so much.)

Am I depressed? No. Sleep apnea? Yes but it’s been successfully treated for three years now. PTSD and Anxiety? No, at last I don’t believe so.

Maybe I need more than a single glass of wine. I’m also thinking about a new mattress. As nice as the one I have is, it is getting on in years and I’ve slept on hotel ones that are much better. What I will not do is use a pill.

If any one has any ideas, I would love to hear about them. Write me, comment on this post, whatever. I need to get back to creative writing. If I don’t, I’ll go nuts anyway.

Perfection

I heard a quote last night when watching NCIS on TV. Special Agent Gibbs quoted Yogi Berra with the following.

"If the world was perfect, it wouldn't be."

Just to be clear, I never heard the quote before and I found it intriguing. I spent some quality time in reflecting upon it.

We’ve all wished the world was perfect. I know I have on many occasions. After all, who wouldn’t want to live in a perfect utopia, where all needs are met and want is nonexistent.

Yet, the more I thought about the quote, the more I realized, he may be correct. Analyzing the comment, I first applied the concept to myself. Then, I applied it to the lady in my life who happens to be the love of my life. After that, I expanded it out to my family, friends, acquaintances, people I don’t know and for that matter, everyone on the planet.

To keep it simple let’s look at it as it applies to myself. After that, just expand my rationale to everyone else.

If the world were perfect, I would have been raised by perfect parents. I would have great relationships with them as well as my siblings. I don’t now but I’ve often wished it. I would also live in a home filled with love. Well I do have that now but that was not always the case. I would have money enough to buy anything I wanted. Oh wait. There would be no want. I already have everything I ever wanted. So why do I need money?

In my career of choice, I’m a computer network technician and software engineer. I’ve enjoyed learning how to manage, program and maintain computer systems. In my personal life, I’ve pursued learning about the arts. I am a decent artist and writer. I learned a long time ago to deal with repair and maintenance on my house, my car and … well whatever I needed to figure out.

In case you’ve not guessed it, I enjoy solving problems and puzzles. However, in this perfect utopian world, there would be no problems in need of solving. There would be no puzzles to piece together. There would be no challenges to overcome. Extrapolating further and applying this to everyone else, we would all be in the same position. All of our wants are met and therefore, we would want for nothing.

How boring!

I can only conclude that if the world was perfect, I would not have a place in it where I was happy. Therefore, can I truly say it’s a perfect world since my world is not perfect. How about you?

I guess I don’t want to live in a perfect world after all. What the hell am I say? Please, someone slap me silly.

Chaos

I read a quote from Tom Barrett today. He wrote:

"Chaos in the world brings uneasiness, but it also allows the opportunity for creativity and growth."

This is similar to a concept I’ve lived my entire adult life which I believe comes from a Chinese philosopher millennia ago. I learned it of it in high school.

"Change plus Opportunity equals Growth".

For me, I live by these words. It seems that my life has always been a journey through chaos. Isn’t it for everyone? When I recognized that the chaos brought opportunity, I realized the opportunities were simply a means for growth.

Looking back at the last several decades, and in reviewing my life to date, I appreciate how much my life changed and how far I grew. Sometimes I say to myself “if only I knew then what I know now!” Again, I know everyone wishes that. I would like to think I would have made better choices along the way, kept my mouth shut and gotten laid instead of asking the question “Why are you doing this?” Yup, I asked that question right in the middle of the act where upon, she said “You’re right” and threw me off. Crap.

There were other decisions I made along the way that I’m glad I made them. Falling in love? Yup. Great. Marrying her. Bad decision. Buying my first new car? Awesome, I loved it. Selling same car to pay for the marriage? Awful.

My life is fraught with decisions like this, as most people I suspect enjoy. Earlier I wrote that at times I wished I had made different decisions. Yet, if I had made different decisions, I wouldn’t be the person I am today. And I like who I am. I LOVE who I am. I’m happy, even when chaos comes knocking.

There is a one thing I know and it will guide me in my decision-making process the rest of my life. I will never be afraid to make a decision nor fret over it when it turns out to be a bad decision. If I do nothing, I will stagnate and die.

So, throw me the chaos (small doses in you don’t mind). I will then find the opportunity and I will find inner growth and peace of mind.

Skinning a cat!

They say that there are many ways of skinning a cat. Before I go on, let me just say this. I have no idea why or where this saying came from, nor do I care. However, I believe I understand what the saying is trying to convey. The imagery of the saying popped into my head the moment the following happened.

This morning, on my FB page, I saw an inspirational post that went something like this.

Elementary Nine6 + 3  = 9

but so does 5 + 4 = 9

By extension, so does (8 + 1), (7 + 2), (9 + 0), (3 * 3), (9 * 1), (27 / 3) and so on.

They all equal 9.

Classroom pop quizSo what?

Unless you’re in school and you are doing a test, it’s not the answer that is important. It’s how you got to the answer. It’s the journey. That’s all that matters. The journey starts with the first step.

It’s the journey.

This is Richard Verry, taking his first steps in rewriting a chapter or two for my new book ‘Lucky Bitch’ based upon an inspiration I had last night while I was half asleep.

Muses

Who is your muse?

As part of the series of interview questions, I was asked these questions. “Who is your muse?” and “Who do you turn to for ideas when you get stuck?”

Stream of consciousness eyeThe answer is complicated but isn’t it always? For me, it depends upon the time frame of my life. Overall, there have been three muses in my life. Two I still use today.

The first was Darlene or Dar for short. Everyone called her Dar. Over a decade ago, Dar helped me learn the techniques to express myself in the visual arts. She started out as a mentor, showing me how to properly put pencil to paper and to put paint to canvas. Over time, we became more than that and we shared much of ourselves with each other. We would bounce ideas off each other, share our artwork and spend other more relaxing activities together. We could communicate on many levels. Over time, I had yet another upheaval in my life and I lost touch with her. There are days when I miss her presence in my life and think of her.

For a long while, I didn’t really have a muse I could turn to ideas from. I did have a girlfriend who thought I did a really could job capturing the human form but in the end, she didn’t help inspire me. I got more ideas from the internet than I did from her. Need I say more?

lips with luscious red lipstickThen I met my current girlfriend who is now my committed partner in life. We share everything, including honesty in our beliefs. I love that about her. I can tell her anything about me. I can tell her my deepest, sometimes darkest, thoughts and feelings. Sometimes she can’t stand to hear some of the stuff that bounces around in my head. However, she is a smart, intelligent lady who can deal with my shit. Most importantly, she allows me the freedom to share and I love that about her. Of course, she can share herself with me in the same way and I strive hard to give her the same satisfaction as she gives me.

The other person whom I look to as my muse is really a good friend. We’ve never shared a bed, nor been more than a good friend to each other. She is in a committed relationship with her husband and I am very happy for her. We have a lot in common. We are both trying to get our individual businesses off the ground. Our problems in that regard are similar but also different. Her business is mostly local and she can directly interact with her customers. Mine is global and I have no idea who most of my customers are.

Yet, when we need to confer, exchange ideas and ask opinions of each other, she is one I will look towards. She thinks like me and we share many of the same interests. My girlfriend is very vanilla and until she met me, had little knowledge of the lifestyle I am close to. My other muse is in the same lifestyle as I am. She appreciates the subtleties of my characters and their development. She understands my characters and what motivates them.

So, when I need to bounce ideas for an entire storyline, I turn to my girlfriend. When I need to confer the subtleties of my characters and their motivations, I turn to my other muse.

Coffee in front of steamy windowLast night, for example, we met for coffee just to catch up. As much as I tried to avoid talking about my next book we somehow migrated to it. I expressed that I thought my main character was too much of a wuss and that she was acting out of character. She helped me with ideas to strengthen her character and bring her back in line with what the storylines expect.

Between the two of them, I have found a happy place. Each have their own perspectives, each offers me great ideas and each stimulate me in ways that neither could image.

Who do you use as a muse as you exercise your talents? I’ve shared with you and I hope you’ll return the favor.

Have a great day and a better tomorrow!

Found a Great Plugin for WP

Found a great Word Press plugin. Google Analytics Dashboard for WP. When you this, you will easily see what your customers are doing when they come to your site and from where they come from.

Google Analytics Dashboard for WPI’ve had a Google Analytics Code for some time now. After getting my ducks in a row, so to speak, with getting the framework of my business up, I am now starting to focus on my overall web presence.

Google Analytics is a premier tool to research how your customers are getting to your site and what they do when they get there.

While I’ve had my code a long time, I’ve not been able to figure out how to use it effectively. Enter Google Analytics Dashboard for WP. This plug-in for my site allows me to look at the analytics data collects and displays it in a usable format. It effectively converts data into information.

This information has already opened my eyes to the patterns my visitors behaviors. Such as ‘Bounce Rate’. Mine is way too high over overtime, I can see that I must be doing something right. It’s coming down, slowly but noticeably. Google even offers suggestions on how to tweak my analytics settings to account for my heavy use of blogs etc. They also help with suggestions to reorganize my site to improve the bounce rate.

The plug-in inserts a panel on my admin page that allows me to reorganize the data in a number of different ways. Reviewing this data will take me weeks in order to figure out what I need to do. In between writing new stories, writing a chapter or two, or simply thinking up a new idea for down the road.

Try it out and let me know what you think. I look forward to reading your comments.

Hot Pepper Sauce – a day later

Fire hot pepperYesterday, I wrote about my experiences with this nasty hot pepper sauce. Knowing what I know now, I’ll do everything I can to avoid a repeat of that experience. 24 hours later, I still feel the effects of the pepper sauce. My hands still tingle a bit and I have to be careful to NOT touch anywhere around my eyes. Residual oils that I can’t seem to get rid of, still permeate my skin.

However, that is not why I’m writing this note right now. I’m writing to thank everyone who wrote in with tips and suggestions of what to do in the future. Seems the consensus is to use milk. That would have been fine if I ate the sauce. But what about washing, my hands, my eyes and other parts of my body. I still don’t know what the solution is for that. Thank you just the same. I really appreciate it and I sincerely hope I won’t have to deal with that again.

I can tell you that I don’t have milk in the house. I rarely do. But I have coffee creamer, vanilla flavored in fact. Couple that with Kahlua and Vodka and you get a really delicious White Russian. I don’t know which helped more, the creamer or the vodka but by the time I went to bed, I could sleep through the night. I still had to be careful where I put my hands but I woke up this morning feeling much better.

So, I would like to repeat. Should anyone ever want to come over to my house, please … PLEASE, leave the hot sauce at home.

You sometimes describe yourself as ‘deviant’. If you consider yourself normal, why is that?

Let’s go back to Webster’s Dictionary definition of the word.

Deviant def: ‘different from what is considered to be normal or morally correct.’

Now mind you, I say that I am sometimes a deviant from the side of my mouth, in jest. Yet, I do feel that at times. I was raised in a traditional home with  liberal thinking parents and a house full of female siblings. I instinctively know that I think differently from so many people around me. Most of my community, including family and friends, are more traditional in their thinking than I. They are more conservative and middle of the road in their thinking. They aren’t open-minded and appear to be set in their ways.  

Normality, as in the American dream, was what I ever known. Religious, hard working, earning a living  and eating dinner at 6 pm with the family was my norm.

You get the picture.

Stand out in a crowdMe, I don’t subscribe to this view of life. It’s way too ‘vanilla’ for me. I rebelled from this mindset when I became an adult. I believe in whatever makes you happy so long as it doesn’t hurt someone else.

I believe in the right to love who you want, sleep with whomever, one on one or more. I believe in monogamy, polygamy and group marriage even though I don’t believe I could deal with the stress of multiple spouses. One is quite enough, thank you very much.

I believe in sharing and loving without reservation. With that, I do have expectations in those whom I love. I believe in polyamorous family units. I believe in same-sex marriage. I believe in being single as well, if it suits you.

I believe in power exchange in adult play among consenting partners.

I believe in doing what’s best for myself, my family and my friends. I believe in giving of myself. I believe that it is okay to have expectations from those you love. They say ‘you can’t choose your family but you can choose your friends’. I say you can choose both. If family or friends don’t live up to your expectations and can’t offer you what you need, then I choose to find a new family and new friends.

Not that I live outside society’s norms. I will, however, try to rise above society’s expectations and pull the rest of you along with me, if I can. If I see that you have something to offer to help me rise to greater heights, I will accept whatever gifts you offer in attaining growth and enlightenment.

So to that extent, I consider myself a deviant … also normal.

Thank you OOPS

Thank youOops.

I just realized that I am human too. Alright, you can stop laughing now. I know I am human and I make mistakes. And I made a big one a little while ago.

I was just re-reading my blog, published to thank all of those folks in my life that in some way, contributed to my personal growth this past year. As I was reading it, I realized that I forgot a whole segment of people who I needed to thank.

It is you, my fans and followers. Those who read my blogs every day, those who follow me on Twitter and Facebook. It’s everyone who has read my books and/or posted a review on them. Without you, I wouldn’t be doing this nor would my spirits soar as they do when I hear from you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you!

So, this entry is for you, my fans and followers. I appreciate all that you do. Thank you.

Perhaps it was the ‘Get off the fucking stage’ music that was running in my head as I was writing my earlier piece. After years of watching award shows and glad for the music, I now realize just how distracting it can be for the person on the stage. I feel for you man! (Oops, I did it again.) I feel for you all, men and women alike. It really is a tough gig and I have a new-found respect for your talents.

So, again, thank you to all of my followers. A big special thank you for those who have taken their valuable time to read my books. Whether you like to read a little or a lot, if you have slotted one of my books into your schedule, taken the time to read it, THANK YOU. If you haven’t yet already, that’s okay. There’s still time. I welcome the opportunity to thank you at a later date.

The books are available, right here on my website, RichardVerry.com or at Amazon, B&N, iBook etc.

As the holiday season winds down.

With the holidays winding down and I recover from a bad cold and too much food and drink, I would like to take the opportunity to thank the people who have helped me on my journey this year.21886846_s-Coctail in glass with ice and lemon on black

First off, thank you to the love of my life, Janet. She has put up with a lot of my shit this past year. Even though she grumbles and frets, she knows that I’m no slouch and what I have been trying to do this past year is for her benefit, as well as mine. I love her so much and I appreciate everything she has ever done or will do for me.

I would like to thank my sister Jean for simply believing in me. She struggles to understand and feels remorse when she can’t support me when I ask. I rarely ask Thank youanything of her, just preferring her love. Usually, she is the first in line to help yet this past year, I asked her for something that was important to me. Much to my surprise, she didn’t know how to tell me that she couldn’t and it severely distressed and anguished her. Through her tears, I retracted my request. Our love for each other is more important.

Then there’s Leah. I don’t  remember how I found her yet this fine lady has found a way to boost my confidence and help me grow. She is putting me on the right path to being a successful writer. I’ve never met her but I almost think of her as family.

Then there are those who I consider my best friends these many years who wish to remain nameless in this forum. I look forward to spending time with them soon. One of these friends has been helping me develop my story-lines. Because of her generosity, she is now a recurring character in the next major novel I am writing. She’s a loving, spiritual person who is working hard on her latest business venture. I wish her much success and try to support her as best I can in this endeavor. Another friend is busy working on her upcoming marriage and I know she is there if I need her. I can’t wait to attend her wedding. It will be the highlight of the year.

I’m also thankful to my employer. Anything that needs to be done, I am willing to do. No problemo. I’ve been jobless and hungry before and I never want to experience that ever again.

Happy New Year stars streamers vectorAs I write this, I am realizing that there are many other people who have helped me throughout the past year. I am grateful and very appreciative to all. In my head, I hear the orchestra playing the ‘Get Off the Fucking Stage’ music as if I was giving a speech at an awards ceremony. You get the idea. So in closing, thank you one and all. I hope I get the chance to tell you in person the next time I see you.

Happy New Year! May 2016 be a great one.

To find out more about me and read my blogs, check out my website, RichardVerry.com.

Holidays in Mona’s Realm

HOLIDAYS AS THEY RELATE TO MY CHARACTERS

Are there holidays in Mona’s Realm?

Hot Chocolate Warmest HolidaysHolidays are completely different in Mona Bendarova’s world. Introduced in ‘The Taste of Honey’, Mona’s community comes together for monthly and quarterly celebrations. There are no holidays per se commemorating people, specific events or beliefs.

Monthly celebrations are more of a community gathering where people come together and enjoy each other’s company. It’s a time for revelry, entertainment, eating, drinking, and enjoying sex. Seed is spilled and deposited into willing recipients frequently at these celebrations. Most fertile women wake up the following morning happy and pregnant after a night of pleasure. For the rest, they are simply happy and most certainly satiated.

Quarterly celebrations on the other hand are bigger and more involved events. Generally, they follow the seasons, roughly scheduled around the Summer and Winter Solstices plus the Fall and Spring Equinoxes.

The Spring Equinox hails the coming growing season where the community plans to produce the bulk of their non-protein based food. The Summer Solstice salutes the height of the warm sun, long pleasant days and short warm nights. The Fall Equinox celebrates the harvest gathering, giving thanks for what the land has given them despite the atrocities it suffered in the past.

Winter Blonde in White Knit DressThe biggest celebration of the year is the Winter Solstice. This festivity focuses upon hope and joyful reunions for the coming year. It is denoted by enjoying the rich milky way of stars lighting the night skies, providing a backdrop for a magical time of year. The longest night of the year is celebrated by staying warm, enjoying each other’s bodies and conceiving the greatest diversity within the gene pool. Even conceptions in the breeding farms don’t distribute the gene pool as much as what happens at this celebration.

Therefore, celebrations are a holiday in a sense. They provide an opportunity to ensure the survival of the human species. It is a way to enjoy life yet most importantly, to preserve it.

Now, as I reflect upon these celebrations, I can’t help wish that our own holidays follow a similar scenario. Fun and revelry among friends and strangers where sharing joy, pleasure and seed is expected, world-wide? What’s not to like? Not that I expect to see it come to pass in my lifetime but I wonder what our lives might be like sharing similar celebrations. I firmly believe that we would be better off if we divorce ourselves from out petty differences, slice away the personal agendas and welcome our differences as opportunities to grow.

IDIC MedallionAs I write this, I am reminded of the concept ‘IDIC’ introduced by Gene Roddenberry in his original TV series, ‘Star Trek’. ‘IDIC’ stands for Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations. I embrace this view of the world. I firmly believe we are better with our differences than without. Rather than homogenizing our species, it’s our differences that allow us to grow stronger.

What do you think? Can we all embrace our differences, enjoy our humanities and love our fellow-man? I do.

Please, share your thoughts with me. I welcome constructive view points, whether I agree with them or not. Perhaps one day, world-wide, we can celebrate a holiday of love, joy and pleasure.

I’m BAAACKKKK!!!!!

Whew, I'm glad that's over!
Whew, I’m glad that’s over!

After more that a week trying to turn this new site live, it’s finally here. The usual problems surfaced but in the end, I think I have a great product for your enjoyment. I hope you will agree.

It’s hip! It’s trendy! It’s HOT! It’s sexy!

Please leave me a comment. We both would love to know what you think about the site. I look forward to reading your comments.

The site has a brand new look and a new brand. I’ve replaced the brand I built over the years to one that is truly suitable to whom I am. The site also is geared to both my blog and my books. I urge you to buy and read them. I believe you will find them an excellent read.

I must give thanks to my web designer, Leah Hart of CreativWriter.com, who worked tirelessly on the site and was my bitch’ for more than a day. It was a learning experience for both of us. The pic in this post is an homage to her. I truly hope she takes time out for herself and relishes the cup(s) of coffee she so loves.

It has not escaped my notice that she drank coffee to remain awake and alert as she worked on my site as well as take care of her other clients, her husband, her kids and her family. I don’t think I can keep up with you. Enjoy the fresh aroma Leah. You earned it.

Please know I am very pleased with the work you have done for me. I look forward to a long-term relationship building my business. I happily recommend Leah Hart and CreativWriter.com services for your business ventures. If you need help in boosting your endeavors, please hire Leah. I believe she will work as hard for you as she did for me.

In the meantime, please check out the site, its new look and buy a book or two. I have three more going through editing, a sequel to Mona’s story and I woke up with a brand new idea for a new book.

I’ve got to get back to writing. All this web redesign shit has taken away from writing. So, until next time. Salute.

Announcing a new look

Tuesday, November 3

maggicalExpressions will be revealing a brand new look

It’s going to be hip!
It’s going to be trendy!
It’s going to be HOT!
It’s going to be oh, so sexy!

It will have a whole new look and feel!

You’re going to love it.

I’ll be integrating a bunch of new features. I can’t wait for the week to go by. It’s a lot of work but I hope you will trust me when I say …

It’s going to be worth it.

Set your calendar!

Tuesday, November 3.

Look for it!

I’m very excited. I have to pinch myself!

Announcing a new look

I’m very excited and I feel the need to pinch myself!

maggicalExpressions will be releasing a new site on

Tuesday, November 3.

It’s going to be hip! It’s going to be trendy! It’s going to be oh, so sexy!

It will have a whole new look and feel!

You’re going to love it.

I’ll be integrating a bunch of new features. I can’t wait for the week to go by. It’s a lot of work but I hope you will trust me when I say …

It’s going to be worth it.

Set your calendar!

Tuesday, November 3.

Look for it!

Personal Responsibility

  1. I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I fall in. I am lost. … I am hopeless. It isn’t my fault. It takes forever to find a way out.
  2. I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend to not see it. I fall in again. I can’t believe I am in the same place. But, it isn’t my fault. It still takes a long time to get out.
  3. I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I see it is there and I still fall in. … it’s a habit. My eyes are open. I know where I am. It is my fault. I get out immediately.
  4. I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I walk around it.
  5. I walk down a different street.

Unknown Author


I recently came across this autobiography in 5 short chapters. I was taken with it’s poignancy. There is a lesson here and I know what I think. But what about you? Care to share what you think?  I’d like to know. Please leave a comment.

Chaos

“Chaos in the world brings uneasiness, but it also allows the  opportunity for creativity and growth.” Tom Barrett

I came across this quote while I was researching a concept for my next book and I found it quite intriguing. I want to share it with you.

For me, chaos is an everyday thing. I live in chaos each every day. My life is chaotic all by itself but the world around me forces it to be even more chaotic. I navigate the chaos with trepidation and uncertainty but lean on my experience and intelligence to figure a way though it and be happy with my solution. I’m not always successful but I continue to work at it.

I expect that everyone reading this feels the same way.

One thing that I have always known is that opportunity is an avenue for growth. What’s new is that I never put it together with chaos.

The thought that chaos brings about uncertainty and therefore uneasiness is intriguing enough. Now, I can connect chaos as an opportunity for creativity and growth.

Just saying.