I trust that all is well with you and that you survived New Years. I did, but it was not one of the favorite evenings in my lifetime. First, staying up to midnight was an arduous task. Fortunately, a game of dominos helped a lot. Since my concussion, I haven’t been up that late, which is now in the sixth month.
The injury also left me extremely sensitive to sensory items, such as sound, sight, and smells. That is, more “Good morning one and all”
Good Morning. I trust everyone is recovering nicely from the festivities of last weekend. You’d better, as the New Year is this coming weekend. Are you hosting or going to a party to celebrate the passing of 2016 (good riddance) and the arrival of 2017? I plan too, but as of yet, I haven’t finalized my plans. I’m sure we’ll figure it out. And if you’re like me, and occasionally skip the party for a quiet evening at home, with or without a loved one, then I say, sounds like a great plan.
I had planned on writing this post yesterday. What kept me? Good question.
As most of you know, I suffered a severe concussion over the summer. I’ve been dealing with the after-effects ever since. I still suffer from short-term memory loss and an infrequent but consistent inability to form coherent sentences. I start therapy for that the middle of January for that.
Most concerning to me is my constant headaches. There hasn’t been a day when I have been without one since July. It sucks, and I am at a loss. My neurologist has stepped up my prescriptions in which I have to increase the dosage week-by-week gradually. I won’t be at full dosage until the end of January. But that isn’t why I failed to write to you yesterday.
I’m now in physical therapy. I have sessions twice a week. Yesterday was the first after the holiday. I go to PT with the expectation that they will beat me up and I need to rest when I get home. Yesterday, man did they ever beat me up. I never thought forty-five minutes of any activity would be so excruciating and so debilitating afterward.
When I got home after yesterday’s PT, I was exhausted, in pain, and my headache climbed a few notches. Hey, isn’t PT suppose to reduce my headaches? Well, that’s what I hope for, but at this early stage, it is far more likely that I will continue experience yesterday’s result for the near future. So, I’m walking in the door, the house is quiet, and my loving girlfriend is still asleep. I grabbed several glasses of water and gulped them down. Then I made a cup of coffee and while that was brewing, drank another glass of water.
When the coffee was ready, I plopped down in my recliner where I spent much of the day. I never felt so physically tired after just forty-five minutes. It’s as if I worked a construction site, or a factory floor, for ten hours. I was mentally and physically fatigued. What the hell is up with that, anyway?
After a mid-afternoon nap, a quiet evening, and a good night’s sleep, I feel much better. Despite still having my headache. Damn, when will I ever get relief?
Care to share your stories? I’ll be happy to read, and if you like, I’ll publish them. Till next time, I’m back to writing and enjoying the season. I hope you have a great day and a better tomorrow.
Well, it’s the day after Christmas.
The world still exists, and I am recovering from hosting a number of people for the holiday feast. As Dr. Seuss wrote, we served roast beast, au gratin potatoes, green beans and a broccoli cheese casserole.
For desert, we served a wide array of strawberry rhubarb pie, cannolis, cheese puffs and the annual traditional rum cake. Oh, and let’s not forget the numerous bottles of wine and spirits consumed.
For me the best of all was the local and best cheesecake I’ve ever tasted from Cheesy Eddie’s. I love their cheesecakes, especially the perfect New York style. My belly hurts just thinking about it all.
They tell me that the roast beast was cooked to perfection. It’s amazing what you can do if you have a great recipe from the butcher shop and an accurate thermometer. Hint: virgin olive oil, garlic, salt, pepper and fresh thyme lovingly rubbed into the meat before cooking. I think it was the thyme that made the difference. Delish.
Everyone had a great time and I even heard comments like ‘this is my favorite party,’ ‘looking forward to coming back next year,’ and so forth. Warms my heart though I always look forward to bedding down afterwards and sleeping in the next day. Ah! That’s today.
Despite the chaos and cacophony of loud conversations, I managed to survived to the day after Christmas without too much trouble. Of course, for awhile and in order to stem the growing concussion migraine headache I’ve lived with for the past five months, I had to wear dark glasses and ear plugs at times to soften the assault to my brain. Fortunately, I kept it in check and even managed a couple of glasses of red wine.
Today is recovery day. My girlfriend and I are just chilling, taking it easy. Whew! We had a great time but I’m glad it’s over.
Chilling out and relaxing is giving me a chance to read my new novel on my eBook reader (my phone) as if I am an ordinary reader. So far, so good. There are probably a couple of very minor edits I will do. I’m marking them as I read. When I finish the novel, I’ll incorporate them into a second edition of the book.
I must say, I’m very pleased with the way the book turned out. I love the story, and regardless of the circumstances of the main characters, there is budding romance that came about entirely by accident. It is not in the nature of either character to see the other with warm, compassion, and love, yet, each character’s heart softens to the other as the story unfolds. Of course, with any good story, you’ll need to read the book to see whether their romance flourishes or explodes.
Sure, it’s gritty and disturbing, even horrific at times but it’s also a gripping story that keeps you connected to the end. Afterall, a good story needs conflict, drama, and suspense to keep you riveted to the story. Give me a week, and I’ll upload the second edition. I’m sure you’ll like it.
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays everyone. I’m looking forward to a better 2017.
Protocol (noun) PROH-tuh-kawl
1 : an original draft or record of a document or transaction
2 : a preliminary memorandum of diplomatic negotiation
3 : a code prescribing strict adherence to correct etiquette and precedence
4 : a set of conventions for formatting data in an electronic communications system
5 : a detailed plan of a scientific or medical experiment, treatment, or procedure
“A protocol that arose from Weizmann Institute of Science, Rehovot, Israel, research has led to U.S. Food and Drug Administration approval of a biological drug for the treatment of a certain form of lung cancer.” — USA Today, 1 Oct. 2016
“Throughout Obama’s first term, critics described him as naïve, particularly in the area of foreign relations—so ignorant of practical realities that he didn’t even understand the symbolic protocols of a state visit. In 2009, when he bowed to Emperor Akihito, on a trip to Tokyo, he was referred to on the far right as ‘treasonous.'” — Jon Lee Anderson, The New Yorker, 3 Oct. 2016
In Late Greek, the word prōtokollon referred to the first sheet of a papyrus roll bearing the date of its manufacture. In some instances, it consisted of a flyleaf that was glued to the outside of a manuscript’s case and provided a description of its contents. Coming from the Greek prefix prōto– (“first”) and the noun kolla (“glue”), prōtokollongave us our word protocol. In its earliest uses in the 15th century, the word referred to a prologue or preface and also to a record of a document or transaction. In the late 19th century, it began to be used in reference to the etiquette observed by the Head of State of France in ceremonies and relations with other dignitaries. This sense has since extended in meaning to cover any code of proper conduct.
As a software engineer, programmer and network technician, I live and breathe protocols. In fact, I see the entire world as an intricate pattern of protocols. Every interaction between two things, objects, animals, and people involves protocols.
Think about it. In western culture, shaking hands is protocol when solidifying a deal. In Europe kissing each other on the cheek is a protocol as a greeting or salutation. In the U.S. kissing on the cheek is less common outside the immediate family. In Japan, people bow to each other in a sign of respect when greeting each other.
In the wild, if you watch the social interactions of a lion pride, you’ll note that there is a pecking order or protocol. A stag will fight another stag to protect his territory from others and to maintain the social order of his does.
In the health industry, there are protocols on everything, right down from triaging an injury to documentation on a case. The NFL recently instituted ‘Concussion Protocols’ to mitigate serious injury in players. Society has protocols on everything, from public nudity to waste recycling to which side of the road one must drive.
Have you ever dated a person who while during a date will interrupt your conversation to take a call, text or otherwise disrupt the evening? I’ve even heard of people answering their phones & text messages while in the midst of having sex. What kind of shit is that? Leave the phone down and enjoy your partner. The caller/texter can wait.
Then of course, are all the protocols involved with just using a cell phone. Thousands of protocols are used to connect you to your friend or relative, regardless of whether they are in the next room or across the globe. I won’t go into all of them but please believe me, there are a lot.
If you share this post via Twitter, you will receive a sexy bonus picture related to today’s word.
I love learning the different contexts of these words of the day. Do you? Please share your comments. I’m sure we would all like to read them.
Have a great day.
Brought to you by Merriam-Webster, Word of the Day.
Hello all,
Yesterday I wrote to you to let you know that I’m still here, and doing more than just posting my ‘Words of the Day’. Those posts are courtesy of Merriam-Webster, but instead of just reposting posts, I add my thoughts and my takes on the word. I try to find interesting imagery and commentary to support the term. Sometimes, I’ll just say, “I don’t know” and leave it at that. Sometimes, I’ll admit, that I never heard of the word before, or doubt that I will ever use it.
What I do find interesting, many words are already a part of my vocabulary or ones where I knew the meaning but not the word itself. Take for example, ‘triptych’. Since I was a young child, I knew of the style and structure of what the term referenced. After all, I grew up with artwork all around my home. Now I know its name. You can be sure that I will find the opportunity to use it.
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Which brings me to the extra that I make available in these posts. If you share the post on Twitter, by clicking my Twitter button, you’ll receive a special, sexier image that I added for my Twitter followers. Try it and you’ll be helping me in the process.
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On a different topic, I wrote about the publicizing of my posts to the various media outlets. Most of the time, my posts make it to my social media sites. Most of the time, my posts do not make it to my email subscribers. While I’m still upset by the situation, there is little I can do about it for the time being. All I can do is keep on nagging customer service.
Which brings me to their customer service, which I find is supportive and helpful, but their processes and background systems are extremely poor. I’ve worked help desk jobs before. Never in my career as an IT engineer had I ever worked with a system where an email by a customer, referencing their support ticket number would push that communication to the bottom of the queue. Any subsequent emails would push it back down once again. The only way of getting serviced is to send the mail and wait 48-72 business hours before a response.
Yet, I may have uncovered new data which may help the situation but if I try to communicate it to support, my message gets pushed down to the end of the queue. Frustrating to say the least.
Okay, I know I’m ranting, but if you’re interested in knowing who this vendor is, please send me a note.
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I have verified that sending my posts later in the day has a greater level of success of those posts reaching my audience. So, it appears that I’ll have to shift the times I publish to later in the day. Apologies to you early risers or those from Europe and Asia. Rest assured; you’ll be able to read them when you wake up the next day.
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No change on the concussion front, except my doctor has prescribed a new med which could take upwards of a month to determine whether it affects me or not. The nerve block barely made a dent so I’m hoping this has better success.
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On top of it all, I just realized that my site is being attacked, probably with a denial of service attack, at least that is how it appears to me. On the phone right now with my hosting company. Wish me luck.
Per their recommendation, I am implementing tighter security on my site, which I probably should have done months ago. Who knew?
Update: I had to hold off publishing this post until the DOS attack resolved. I think it’s over now. The site appears to be behaving normally once again. Here’s to crossing my fingers.
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I wrote a lot yesterday, finding an opportunity to take the novel from true first person perspective to include action from the antagonists. Soon, I’ll start writing more about this new novel.
Now, it’s time to get back to work. The novel is knocking on the inside of my skull, like a cat, demanding to open the door so it can be let out.
Thanks for reading. Have a great day and a better tomorrow.
p.s. I’ve included a bonus picture when you retweet this post using one of my Twitter buttons.
I know lately, all you have heard from me are my ‘Word of the Day’ posts. I didn’t mean for this to go on so long, my not sharing with you what is going on.
These last many months have been very strange for me. As you may recall, or not and that’s okay too, I suffered a severe concussion at work. That was in mid-July, and I’ve been out of work since then, as I’m still dealing with the after-effects. Now, mostly it’s the headaches and occasional short-term memory issue.
Then, in mid-August, my website began running into problems, which are still going today. It’s mid-November, and the vendor involved still hasn’t fixed it.
Apparently, I’m not alone with this problem, but I still had to involve my web hosting company and spend hundreds of hours on triaging the problem. Eventually, the company relented and reported that their email administrators had discovered a ‘race’ condition between their mail servers which affected me. I think that the servers are either overloaded or undersized. My tests seem to support that my posts that go out late in the day have a better chance of being delivered to my email subscribers than those that go out earlier in the day. That’s right. Not everyone is getting their mail sent to them. I received this note from them early this morning.
“I’ve let our developers know about this so they can investigate further.”
It’s the same problem that surfaced back in August, and they’re still dicking around with investigating the problem?
Another consequence of my concussion was that for a long time, I was unable to use my computers. Looking at the screen gave me severe headaches. While the headaches remain, I can now look at computer screens without making them worse.
I also suffered from cognitive thinking and short-term memory issues. What really disturbed me was that my continuous stream of creative thinking that was a part of my entire life … disappeared. For months, the imagery that was so much a part of me was gone. I felt like I lost a lover, a friend, a companion, and … well … me.
I tried to encourage its return by editing my first draft of ‘Lucky Bitch’, the third book in my Mona Bendarova Series. That went okay for a while until I discovered that I had to rewrite the ending. I noticed that I had written much of the material included in the last couple of chapters in the first third of the book. What the fuck? I reached out to my beta readers asking for some help, which they graciously gave. However, without a creative stream of thoughts, I couldn’t rewrite the ending, so I put it aside for the time being. Shit. It’s going to be a full year since I published the second book in the series, ‘Broken Steele’. Shit, but I know that there is nothing I can do about it.
So, I kept working on restarting my creative stream. I’m happy to say, about three weeks ago, the creative stream suddenly flared back with a passion. In an instant, a fully formed idea for a new novel, from start to finish, flashed into my mind, demanding release.
Since then, I have been writing up a storm. I’m consumed with trying to get the novel out of my soul and down in print. Every day since late October, I write. Sometimes, only a few thousands of words get written down but often, I get ten thousand or more out. I’ve haven’t checked recently, but I think I’m over 100k words right now and still going.
It’s wonderful to have the stream back. My live-in girlfriend is at times upset with me as I bury myself in my office and write. In the afternoons and evenings, I’ll sit with her. She controls the TV remote while I pick up my laptop and write. She understands but still feels ignored. It’s a delicate balance but the consuming need to express myself outweighs the need to help her feel comfortable. Later that evening, I will put the laptop down and fully dedicate my time to her.
So, I hope to have this new novel out by the end of the year, but we’ll see. It will need severe editing, as I don’t trust my mind right now to keep all of the characters and timings straight. Automatic spell and grammar checking are fantastic, but there are many things they cannot catch.
One thing I have noticed as I write, sometimes I’ll think of a word I intend to write only to look up at the screen and see an entirely different word. Huh? How did I think ‘dog’ and write ‘dolphin’ or ‘plane?’ Yes, it happens, and I can’t seem to correct it. Perhaps my physical therapy which starts next week will help with that. Frankly, I think just writing will ultimately solve that. I just hope that I don’t pass on an incongruous thought to you in my writing. And if I do, I trust that you’ll forgive me.
I had fun looking for images related to my issues. I hope you like the ones I chose, as well as the sexy bonus pic you will get if you share this post via Twitter.
Right now, I need to get back to my novel. Parts of it are still up there in that noggin of mine, demanding a release from its captivity inside my skull. You’ll forgive me if I stop now and return to my novel.
This is Richard Verry, writing to you from my home office. Thanks for caring. I appreciate all of the kind words people have sent to me over these past several months.
It’s been awhile since I wrote. I trust you don’t mind. I do hope you missed me. I originally posted this earlier in the week only to discover that while it publicized to my social media sites, my blog subscribers did not receive it. Here’s hoping it’s been resolved.
The after effects of my concussion limit my screen time, and what’s worse, my creative thinking is at an all time low. Frankly, it sucks. I worry that it won’t return soon.
In looking at my notes for story lines etc., I know that I had a good fix on the story line for each of my notes. Now, when I review them, it’s not so clear. It’s scary; that’s what it is.
Instead, I decided to focus my energies on editing the first draft of my latest book, ‘Lucky Bitch.’ Easy enough. I am managing to get through maybe two chapters a day before I have to stop and rest for several hours. That equates to one hour of screen time for every five or so hours of rest. It’s barely enough to get through the day. Even so, I have to take frequent breaks during my screen time to get anything done. Nerve racking, to say the least.
Back to editing. I use the tools I have available to me, read the book, chapter by chapter, fix the grammar, pay attention to the plot lines, verify the continuity of the story and so forth. All well and good. Right?
Okay, so I get to the second to last chapter, and I realize that I have to rewrite the entire section. WTF? The subject outline of the chapter is all wrong. I covered that plot line in Chapter 19, one-third of the way into the book. Oh, shit! What the hell am I going to do now? My creative thought processes are worthless at the moment. I have no doubt that they will return but honestly, when?
Doc told me on Monday that I may be suffering the after effects of this concussion for the next two years. TWO YEARS? Oh, my fricking lord. That, after getting a pair of nerve block injections in the back of my neck in an attempt to stop the headache. So far, I’m on my third day and the headache, while diminished, remains constant.
As I review what I am going to do, I’ve decided this much. I will print out the two chapters and hand them out to my beta readers. I’m going to let them tell me which version they like better. Once done, I’ll incorporate the winner into Chapter 19.
In the meantime, what to do with Chapter 43, the second to last chapter of the book. Chapter 43 is intended as a vehicle to get the main character, Mona, away from home for the day, and acts as a setup for the closing chapter, crucial to the book.
So, that’s where I am. I’m jotting down notes as they come to me. Frankly, they’re not worth much at this point. Maybe I’ll stumble onto something. Either way, it may help in the recovery of my creative thought processes. Damn, I never thought I would miss not having them.
So, until next time, this is Richard Verry, Writer signing off and crossing my fingers to get back to where I need to be. Fans, I love you all. Thanks for your patience.
It’s been awhile since I wrote. I trust you don’t mind. I do hope you missed me.
The after effects of my concussion limit my screen time, and what’s worse, my creative thinking is at an all time low. Frankly, it sucks. I worry that it won’t return soon.
In looking at my notes for story lines etc., I know that I had a good fix on the story line for each of my notes. Now, when I review them, it’s not so clear. It’s scary; that’s what it is.
Instead, I decided to focus my energies on editing the first draft of my latest book, ‘Lucky Bitch.’ Easy enough. I am managing to get through maybe two chapters a day before I have to stop and rest for several hours. That equates to one hour of screen time for every five or so hours of rest. It’s barely enough to get through the day. Even so, I have to take frequent breaks during my screen time to get anything done. Nerve racking, to say the least.
Back to editing. I use the tools I have available to me, read the book, chapter by chapter, fix the grammar, pay attention to the plot lines, verify the continuity of the story and so forth. All well and good. Right?
Okay, so I get to the second to last chapter, and I realize that I have to rewrite the entire section. WTF? The subject outline of the chapter is all wrong. I covered that plot line in Chapter 19, one-third of the way into the book. Oh, shit! What the hell am I going to do now? My creative thought processes are worthless at the moment. I have no doubt that they will return but honestly, when?
Doc told me on Monday that I may be suffering the after effects of this concussion for the next two years. TWO YEARS? Oh, my fricking lord. That, after getting a pair of nerve block injections in the back of my neck in an attempt to stop the headache. So far, I’m on my third day and the headache, while diminished, remains constant.
As I review what I am going to do, I’ve decided this much. I will print out the two chapters and hand them out to my beta readers. I’m going to let them tell me which version they like better. Once done, I’ll incorporate the winner into Chapter 19.
In the meantime, what to do with Chapter 43, the second to last chapter of the book. Chapter 43 is intended as a vehicle to get the main character, Mona, away from home for the day, and acts as a setup for the closing chapter, crucial to the book.
So, that’s where I am. I’m jotting down notes as they come to me. Frankly, they’re not worth much at this point. Maybe I’ll stumble onto something. Either way, it may help in the recovery of my creative thought processes. Damn, I never thought I would miss not having them.
So, until next time, this is Richard Verry, Writer signing off and crossing my fingers to get back to where I need to be. Fans, I love you all. Thanks for your patience.
Good morning everyone. As I sit here, at my desk, staring at my screen, I can’t seem to figure out what to write. As I struggle with short-term memory loss and difficult cognitive thought, I recalled a conversation I had the other day with the love of my life regarding a bowl of chocolates.
I think the phrase became popular from the movie ‘Forrest Grump’ though I could be wrong. However, it’s the meaning that I want to comment on. Imagine sitting on your sofa, staring at a bowl of chocolates sitting serenely on your coffee table. The chocolates are the kind that usually come in a box, divided and separated from each other, with different flavors and fillings. You know the kind.
So, the chocolates are sitting there, minding their own business. You sit there, yearning to eat one or two. Yet, there are kinds you know you will like and ones you will not. You’re stuck with indecision, unable to move, fearing that the one you select you’ll spit out.
At some point, you decide to move. Your hand stretches out, hovering over the bowl. Your fingers dangle just out of reach, while you struggle with which one you will choose. I’m sure you know what I mean, even if you don’t want to admit it to yourself. Sooner or later, desire overcomes your fear and indecision and you decide to take a chance. Popping one into your mouth, you await your fate. Did you chose poorly or did you choose wisely?
Right now, my life is kind of like this scenario. Yesterday, the doctor pulled me from work once again. Apparently, the last two visits revealed one important thing. Everything from my neck down is fine. It’s what’s above my neck that is not. Long story short, I found out that I am currently classified as partially disabled at least for the time being. Oh SHIT!!!!
What suffers most? My thinking processes. Cognitive thought. I use the term cognitive thought again and again but I struggle with just what the definition is. I used to know. I know that. Yet, if I don’t pull out the dictionary to remind myself, I can’t accurately define it. What’s worse? The imaginative, creative thoughts and images that used to flow through my head, remain quiet. It’s very disconcerting and disorienting.
For the next couple of weeks, my doctor intends to send me for more intensive follow-up work. I don’t know what will come of it. Sometimes, I feel like Two-Face. On one hand, they want me to curtail most of my activities and behaviors yet at the same time, I am to exercise my brain. To me, they are at odds with each other so I hope the therapy will clear that up for me.
So, for the short-term, my posts will be limited and hit-or-miss. Hopefully, I can get others to post some guest posts for me and/or get my girlfriend to be my secretary and transcribe my ramblings.
In the meantime, I hope you all have a good day and a better tomorrow.
Yes, that’s right. I’m down for the count and thinking about throwing in the towel.
What do I mean by that, you ask?
Don’t worry. I’m not giving up or anything, except for what pertains to the ramifications of my concussion. As many of you know, I suffered a severe concussion back in July. What I don’t do too much is share my experiences with it. Maybe, perhaps, I should.
For the last week, the headaches have been awful. They have been constant since my original injury and don’t seem to be progressing much. As I have learned more about my condition, I have come to terms that I may be experiencing my symptoms for months to come.
I’ve learned that on the pain scale, they range from a morning waking of 1-2 and generally climb from there. Some days are good, though those are a rarity. Generally, by mid afternoon, it reaches somewhere in the 4-6 range. Frankly, it sucks and I am tired of dealing with it.
My quality of life has suffered. I am still missing work. I’m missing social engagements and family time is suffering as well. I have an extreme sensitivity to light and noise. Cacophonous noise is particularly bad. Cognitive thought is difficult, my handwriting has diminished and my spelling sucks. Thankfully, spell check helps here.
What really is making me nervous is how my thought processes have changed. All my life, images and scenes have flooded my mind all the time. Since my childhood, there’s not an hour of the day where I have not noticed this imagery flowing through my mind. I have written about them in the past as they are a part of me.
And now — they’re gone. I’ve not had an image in a really long time. I miss them.
I need them and want them back. So, I officially know that I am down for the count. I’m considering throwing in the towel. Boxing terms related to capitulation for those who don’t know what I mean.
Why? This past week has been particularly difficult. I barely make it through work and when I get home, all I can do is think about doing nothing. Absolutely nothing. Today, Saturday, I literally spent most of the day in my bedroom with the shades pulled and the doors locked. I got up a little while ago and took a shower. That little action has allowed me to write this blog to let you know why I have been quiet lately.
So please, bare with me. This is my issue and I don’t mean to off load on you. However, I thought it important to let you know what is going on with me. Hopefully, I will progress enough to get back into the swing of things.
And please, I need my imagery back. I want to get back to writing. Time is short and I am anxious, nervous and restless. I’ve never rested this much in all my life and I hate it. Back to bed after I send this.
Regards all, and I hope you are all doing well. Till next time ….
