I’m Getting Lax

Concussion photo

But really, am I getting Lax?

Alright, I admit it, I’m getting lax in writing to you. It’s just that I’m excited to get back into rejoining the human race, and going out with friends and family. While I am still recovering from my injury sixteen months ago, I’m down to the short rows in my progress. By that I mean, I’m probably back to 95% of what I was before my injury. It’s this last 5% that is getting to me. My progress slows the closer and closer I get to 100%.

getting lax in returning from my Post Concussion Syndrome

My doctors and therapists tell me, I may never get back to 100%. I won’t accept that. I will continue working hard to stop forgetting names, words, and concepts that are clearly visible in my mind, just not making it past my lips. Grrr…. And, I still have a constant, low-grade headache to deal with that gets me down at times. Rest assured, I’ll figure it all out. In the meantime, I’m enjoying getting back into the swing of things.

The Trafficking ConsortiumAlso, I am writing, though not at the pace I was when I had lots of free time on my hands. My followup book to ‘The Trafficking Consortium’ is well underway. It’s entitled ‘Perfect Prey.’ Anyone who has read the first book will understand the meaning of the title. The first draft is about 60% done, with lots of scenes that need integration into the overall story. Not to fear, I’ll figure it out. I also have a clear understanding of what the third book in the trilogy will entail. Unlike when I wrote ‘The Trafficking Consortium,’ which I expected to be a single, stand-alone novel, Avril’s story is evolving into a trilogy. I hope to finish it by the end of the holidays and begin editing it for real before turning it over to my editor for the heavy red-pen. 😉

More ideas

Plus, I want to finish these two books soon, as I have ideas for more normalized novels that don’t involve crime and punishment. Wouldn’t that be a change in direction? One might even call them romance novels, not that I have read any. I just like the snippets I’ve been writing and sharing with my female friends. They are encouraging me to take this turn, and I’m likely to do it.

In the meantime, sales of all of my books are doing well. I am thankful for the host of people out there who are reading my works. Please, consider writing a review. Good or bad, I enjoy reading them. Plus, they give me incentives to continue writing and refining my talents. Thanks, everyone.

maggicalExpressions

maggicalExpressions

Might I also suggest that you check out my online art gallery at maggicalExpressions. When I need to take a break, relax, and unwind, I tend to draw and paint. This gallery displays a collection of most of my favorite pieces. Let me know what you think. Most are available for sale, either as the original artwork or prints at a substantially reduced price.

So, overall, am I really getting lax? I kind of doubt it.

Have a great day and a better tomorrow.

What is there to say?

Neuro-fatigue

What is there to say?

That is a very good question. I continue pushing through, minute by minute, hour by hour, and day by day. Besides the constant elevated headache, I’m fatigued both mentally and physically. My emotions are raw and all I can do is think about sleep. Ah, blissful sleep, a time when I don’t register my pain and discomfort. And yet, there have been times, when I dreaded going to bed to sleep. What an awful way to live.Neuro-fatigue

It turns out that I must be my own care manager as well as a patient. Sucks, big time, let me tell you. My doctor’s treating my post-concussion symptoms are all specialists, who only know their own narrow field of expertise. The doctor who is managing my case, simply tells me, that they only assess and refer me to specialists. They are not in the business of treating.

“Say what? What kind of shit is that?” I thought as they told me that. But there it is. I have to make the phone calls, follow-up interactions between the various doctors (and yes, there are a lot of them), the pharmacy, and the insurance company handling my worker’s comp claim.

And let’s not get into the impact all this has had on my retirement plan. I just got my statement. My income reported to the plan was about half of what I should have earned last year. It’s not going to be much better next year. I knew I lost some money by being out of work, but really, almost half of my typical income? On top of that, I have to make up the lost time to retire with full benefits, which means I will have to work an additional six months before I retire. Crap!

As of today, I am on two new meds, and so far, I am getting some good results. The next couple of weeks will tell. I am hoping for good news.

Quiet lately

Concussion headache

Quiet lately

Apologies all. I know I have been quiet lately. I had a relapse with my post concussion shit and my headaches reached new heights over the last three weeks. For the first time in my life, I truly feel like I am suffering.

Concussion related headachesI have been working hard over the past couple of months to increase the level of stimuli to my brain, in order to force it to repair the damaged nerve connections. It’s been working and I am progressing. I just think that my brain finally said ‘enough is enough. Give me a break already’ in the only way it knew how. By beating the shit out of me and intensive my headaches to new levels.

A nerve block into the back of my skull and plenty of rest (i.e., doing nothing but sleeping and parking myself in my recliner) seems to be helping. BTW, two needles into the back of my head was not my first choice. The burning and shooting pain that came with it almost took me down all together.

Add into the mix the numerous emotions as a result, and I was barely able to do much beyond my mandatory responsibilities. Yes, I’m not going to list all of the emotions I had to deal with over the past two weeks. I’ve made my girlfriend suffer enough as it was.

So while I have a few moments of clarity, I’m writing to you to let you know that I am thinking of all of you. I plan on continuing my regime of rest today, hoping that by tomorrow, I can start the work week off and not crash by mid-afternoon.

I’ll write when I can. And, I am oh so close to releasing my latest book, ‘The Trafficking Consortium.’ That’s first on my agenda when I can spend quality time on it. Stay tuned. Thanks for your understanding.

 

Post Concussion Syndrome or Writer’s Block

2 Comments
post-concussion syndrome symptoms

Post Concussion Syndrome or Writer’s Block

I’ve been giving a lot of thought to the plot of my next novel. I find that once I am in the midst of the storyline, I feel fantastic. The writing is comfortable and natural. I can lose all track of time and my environment. Much to the despair of my loving girlfriend and partner, I’ve been known to ignore her while I am in the depths of typing out my latest scene. Sorry love.

post-concussion syndrome symptomsI don’t know about you other writers out there, but when I am invested in a character, I tend to feel what they feel, be it pleasurable or not. I like it, and I get to imagine what it is like to experience their lives as they fulfill their destiny.

I need to revisit the realm of one of my characters. I have several great story lines I’d like to delve in one day. Just not today.

I don’t understand why not. I remember how excited I was when I wrote down those story outlines. In fact, I remember one day, writing down over a dozen plots that I could use in developing a new book. Yet, as I reviewed them over the past couple of weeks, none of them stood out and captured my interest. Of course, I wrote all of those notes pre-concussion.

The Trafficking ConsortiumMy question to everyone out there, am I experiencing a writer’s block or did my brain injury affect me in ways that are changing me? I hadn’t thought so last month. I was in the depths of the glory of producing my last novel, ‘The Trafficking Consortium.’ My stream of creative thought, missing for many months after my brain injury, seemed to return with a big bang. Yet, today I wonder if it was just a fleeting spark. The stream, so much a part of my life, has regressed to a mere trickle, falling ever so slowly from a water faucet.

What do you think? Am I suffering a short-term writer’s block or am I suffering from the after effects of my brain injury? Can ‘Post-Concussion Syndrome’ be that devastating? Please leave me a reply by commenting in the field below. Unless otherwise requested, all replies will be publicly shared.

Thanks for reading this and sharing your thoughts. I do appreciate the valuable time you spend in my little corner of the world.

Until next time, this is Richard Verry, sitting at my desk, looking out the window at an unseasonably mild and overcast gray day, and anxious as to whether I will ever return to my normal self.

error: Content is protected!!
UA-69616211-1